To Cell or Not To Cell?...A Rainy Day Question

Okay...like most people, my two year contract has expired on my cell phone...this now means that my cell phone provider will grant me the privilege of upgrading..Yipee!!...Oh, what a day...Oh, what a glorious morning...the possibilities are endless. Where should I start? Online or at the mall...too early for the mall... With the world as my oyster and the endless selection of new cell phones, I begin the arduous task of deciding which new gadget will enjoy the luxurious compartment inside my Coach bag. Yes, for those of you not in the know, Coach makes a nifty, built in little compartment for women who just wouldn't know where else to put their cellphone. Gotta love Coach...they think of everything. However, I have yet to figure out any uses for the companion compartment next to it. Suggestions anyone??

Now that I have a mission, my Saturday seems to have purpose. I will...I must...have the newest cell...but wait...who do I trust to give me the best advice? I read review after review some by fourteen year old kids with advice on the best phones for texting, music and videos others by gadget gurus with years of "technical experience". Sound advice from adults or practical, realistic advice from teens...I opt for the later in hopes that those who use the phones the most will be best able to give an unbiased review.

With my choices narrowed to either the Apple iPhone, Samsung Eternity...(I just love the name of that one)..the Blackberry Bold or the HTC Fuze, I begin the task of deciding. I realize that the only way to truly decide which phone is for me is to take the dreaded trip to the mall...you know the one...drive around the mall a thousand times looking for a parking spot only to end up parking twenty rows back and a quarter mile from the entrance...although, I will have to admit that I have snagged some pretty darn good spots lately...of course that comment just means I jinked myself for the next year...I will be condemned to the overflow lots used at Christmas time. Then, I have to make my way to the AT & T store and fight the hordes of tweens lined up to check out the lastest cell phones...I will probably be somewhere after number 50 on the waiting list just to talk to someone.


Okay....with all the positives in place...yeah, right, I gear up for my rainy day trip to the mall...My Coach bag will thank me later.

pArAmOuR

Legal Language. Every once in awhile I am stumped by a word that I have never encountered. My first inclination is always to ask myself, "What the hell does that word mean?" Then, I stop and think...does everyone else know the meaning...is it a word I should have learned somewhere in my college days...OMG!!...is everyone going to wonder how on Earth I could not know the meaning. Are they going to look at me and think...how did that one ever earn a college degree and a Master of Arts nonetheless...in English.

Then I realize it is often best to just "pretend" you know what it means.... you know, act cool when it's mentioned...go with flow like you've used it a thousand times before...use it in a sentence even if you have no idea what part of speech it could possibly be...let it roll off your tongue in passing...just please, whatever you do, don't let someone use it in a question for which I am supposed to know the answer...I am always thinking why sugar coat something that is eventually going to leave a sour taste in every one's mouth....even if they don't see it coming for years.

Sometimes these words blindside you as the meaning has the power to alter what was once reality. As I painstakingly look up the word in the dictionary, I am quickly drawn to the two simple words used which define what had alluded me at all cost previously..."illicit lover"...how important is knowledge when with it comes the instant that shatters your belief in all that once was...a single moment that forever changes the course of events in what should have been, could have been, would have been, but wasn't...one simple word with the ability to unleash destruction and wreck havoc...damn that dictionary. I shut it quickly hoping that maybe it was wrong. The dictionary wrong?? What am I thinking? I look the word up one more time...just to make sure I got the right one...always good to double check for accuracy. Nope, the meaning hasn't changed.

Now, wait one minute!!...illicit lover....hmmm, I am not sure about you, but back in the day...I believe that would have been labeled as the common slut...better known as...hussy..streetwalker or maybe even prostitute...aka...tramp..harlot..wanton... but, best and always remembered for what it truly is...a whore!!!

Now, I ask myself...why did they have to put such a strange label on something that isn't worth the litter in which my cats urinate and crap?...I am reminded of one of the timeless quotes from Shakespeare..."A rose by any other name is still a rose"...which leads me to conclude "A whore by any other name is still a whore"...if the shoe fits...and you damn well know who you are....something tells me this won't be the first or last time you hear that word. See you around...whore!

pArAmOuR

I'll Drive...If You Dare to get in!!

Very shortly a car company in Mumbai, India will be unveiling what it hopes will turn it's sinking company around....the Nano. Now, you may be thinking to yourself, "What the hell is a Nano?"....didn't Mork from Ork drive one of those?.... Some may be questioning its design...will it have an engine like a Porsche, drive like a Mercedes, have the luxurious interior of a Lexus, the safety of a Volvo or maybe it will combine all these elements into one.

Well, let me be the first to let you in on a secret. The Nano is none of these things. You'll be lucky if it comes with tires. Tata's Nano does not have air bags or anti lock brakes — neither of which is required in India. If you want air conditioning, a radio, or power steering, you'll have to pay extra. And, get this....you only get ONE...that's right...ONE...windshield wiper. I am not exactly sure what you are supposed to do for the other side of the car...I guess your passenger will have to take care of his own side of the car. The Nano, with a starting retail price of $2,233, is about as basic as basic gets.

Now, I don't know about you, but getting in a car that is just a little more than 10feet long seems almost like getting into my own coffin. I mean the bumpers are made out of plastic. Doesn't anyone see warning bells here...come on people...are we really that desperate to save money. One strong wind and we're going over the bridge. Can anyone say tuna can if we get in an accident?



But, don't rush to go out and get one any time soon. They are only able to produce 50,000 of these gems a year due to violent protests by farmers and opposition political party leaders over land at the initial factory site. They are taking reservations...get your pen and paper ready...The $2,000 price tag is only guaranteed for the first 100,000 cars.

Next time I am online shopping...because you can buy these little hotties online...I might just have to add it to my basket. I am sure it is about as safe as my daughter's Barbie Jeep....something tells me the Jeep might be safer...at least it has a Velcro safety belt.